Thursday 2.10.11 – Carlos

Ahh La vida es una locura.

These last 10 days have kept up pace with the first month of the year. In such a good way.

What have we done? Well besides planning and spearheading a grand birthday celebration for Jordan. Painting some new pieces. Filming, Editing a trailer for the greatest movie trailer of all time. writing a few new tracks. Working a few days, hitting the gym 11 times, watching a deserving qb not named tom brady win the super bowl and being ok with it, starting in on 2 new books, cooking ragu and pasta from absolute scratch, meeting some really cool people, starting in on outlines for a new book, a new play, and auditioning for a few big projects.

nothing much.

Let’s talk about my favorite new place in Los Angeles.

Solar De Cahuenga.

At first, it’s an unassuming piece of real estate on the corner of cahuenga and franklin. But once you walk in, you know if you’re gonna enjoy hanging out there. For me, it was noticing the Argentinian decor adorning the walls, including a picture of my name sake Carlos Gardel,  It’s a cool place, full menu, including nice sized entrees and sandwhiches, great coffee, and did i mention is was Argentinian? So one week and 4 visits later, I’m writing this from my new found sanctuary. Its quiet, and nice.

Let’s talk about documentaries

I’ve seen 2.5 of the Academy Award nominated docs, and wow. just wow.

Stakes aside it’s difficult to pick which ones I like the most. Exit through the gift shop, while not as “impacting” as war ot natural resources, resonates because of it’s commentary on the art world. A sucker is truly born every minute, and it is profound to see the subject matter and the consumers truly buy into what appears to be a disingenuous product. Or, the joke is on us, the viewer, kudos to Banksy for making my head spin. Gasland was disturbing and eye opening all together and i hope regardless if it wins or not, enough to open the eyes of the people that can make a difference. Restrepo…the 40 minutes of it i saw…are just surreal, probably because it’s so real. I’ll write more on it when i finish it.

In the meantime check out the trailer for 2016’s Best Short Film Winner

American Steal 2

It’s so nice to be here. In this city and have so many friends who care. I’ve received a great outpouring of help and support from my many wonderful, beautiful friends who are determined to set me up with someone. I maintain that everything else in my life is going so well, i shouldn’t even bother complaining about the lack of a little TLC. And with a handful of relationships that I see on a peripheral basis, maybe i don’t need that right now. Perspective.

I’m sure that everything happens for a reason, and that luck comes with hard work. Sometimes it’s easy to sit by and just hope things will happen to you, or act with a sense of entitlement. Plenty of people I know are like this. Don’t get me wrong, they’re deep down inside good people. But that’s just not my style. I’ve worked for everything i’ve ever accomplished, and usually 2x as hard as the person next to me. I don’t use the fact that I was (am) fat, dark skinned, didn’t know english, didn’t have rich parents, as an excuse. I encourage anyone reading this to never fall into the woe is me mentality that plagues this country. If there is something you are not, and want to become. Become. If there is something you don’t have and want, Go Get It. If there is someone you love, Love Them. But Los, that’s easier said than done. No. No it isn’t. I’ll point you to my literal body of work over the last 8 months. It’s that easy. You will get luckier the harder you work.

See you in a few.

Los

 

 

 

 

Monday 1.31.11 – Carlos

It’s been so long!

So much to update. And I only have 15 minutes before work. Let’s see how much I can type on my bberry before then.

Its been almost 2 months and what a ridiculous 2 months it’s been. Let’s itemize and take it from there.

Fat v Less Fat

I’m on the cusp of 50lbs of weight loss. I seem to fluctuate 5 lbs every day, but I’m gonna go ahead and reach that elusive 217 mark by the middle of the month.

One of the flattering things about this endeavor, along with people I haven’t seen in ages freaking out, is the fact that multiple people have reached out to me and asked how I am doing it. Me. The always fat kid out of the bunch. One of my friends is in ridiculous shape, and he approached me. Talk about making you feel like a million bucks!

It’s so easy, and the hardest part of it is pure mental. There is no secret diet. No pill. No shake. No gimmick. It’s a healthy dose of reality, mental toughness and drive.

If you want details, email me, and I’ll gladly break it down for you. My friends have been seeing amazing results and those on the cusp of making a change will soon take that big step.

Working to be an Actor v A Working Actor

It’s so refreshing to be able to say that I am getting paid to do what I love. Now that’s not to say that I only act. At this point in my career my life is supplemented financially by Acting and that is a big realistic step in the right direction.

7 months in LA and I’ve booked 3 National Commercials, An NBC reality show. 2 plays, and 2 indie films. Along with The Town and The Social Network, that makes a handful of reputable productions I’ve been in.

But it’s not enough and the bug is firmly implanted in me, with Pilot Season about to begin, My agent I will be pounding the pavement. (Here’s hoping hollywood needs a ton of terrorist looking actors!)

Home v Home

What a great 2 month’s it’s been for Poole House West. With everyone else it seems traveling or gone for extended periods of time, it’s been a blast when we are actually all home at the same time.

We fiiiiiinally had a house warming of sorts, billed as a wine and cheese and after a week of intense preparation by every single one of us, it was a smash success! 70ish people dressed to the nines enjoying a ton of classy wine and cheese. Literally 15 years of friends were there, and it was so cool to see so many era’s of my life interacting and mingling.

6 months left of Poole House West, I wonder where we will all be then?

Sports!

So, it sucks the nfl season was cancelled 2 weeks ago due to a foot controversy, but cest la vie. There’s an exhibition game happening this sunday, I may watch it for the commercials.

The Celtics walloped the Lakers in a regular season game, which has as much weight as me making 10 3-pointers in a row. But I’ll take it.

Pitchers and Catchers report in 2 weeks. You can bet your bippy we’ll be purchasing the MLB package.

LA friends.
I’m sitting on a couch in the “hub” of our LA friends circle, and I am just so grateful as to how blessed I am to have so many wonderful people out here. To show me the way, offer assistance, and generally laugh nonstop.

Family
I was lucky enough to play Uncle/Tour Guide to my niece when she came and visited and it was a blast! I hope to bring my lil sister out this summer.

Family
We’ve gotten a new group of Bostonians out here and it’s fantastic seeing them on a regular basis. Having the luxury to call Rod, Tom or Matty C and know they are minutes away is not something I’ll take for granted.

Work
Work is good. A bit boring, but I’m employed and that puts me in the top 87th percentile in this country.

Food.
Itttsss back! I’ve started cooking/reading cooking stories (currently HEAT – the story of Batali among other things) I’ll be teaming up with an old friend and having a super fancy intimate dinner party with many courses. It’ll be at a super secret location, so stay tuned.

Life
All in all, I’m blessed/happy/ecstatic/grateful and looking forward to 2011. Anything missing in my life will surely fall into place. No doubt.

Best.
Los

Jordan Kai 12.31.10 – Friday

So, it isn’t my blog-day… but I’m stealing it and writing and brief, although important post…

When I was on tour last year my beautiful friend Emily said, “in 2010, I’m going to get engaged.” At this time, she was dating (and the term is loosely used, because it was long distance and still not official) someone. But, nonetheless, she put out in the universe exactly what she wanted. She didn’t sully it with any justifications or excuses, she just said this is what I want and I’m putting it in the universe.

A few months later, I got a text message with a photo of her left hand and a beautiful ring on it: engaged. boom.

People are so much more powerful than we give ourselves credit for. We make excuses and give ourselves lots of room to back pedal, just in case something we want doesn’t happen. The truth is, if we spent as much time focusing our energies on what we want, rather than what we’ll do if we don’t get it, we’d all feel a lot more successful, happy, and fulfilled.

2010 was a good year. I did what I said I was going to do: I moved to LA and I got a puppy. These are things that I am very happy/proud of.  But, now, its time to think a little bigger…

That said, this year, 2011, I’m going to use the “Emily Secret” I’m getting EXACTLY what I want this year, without excuses or justification:

1) Broadway.

2) Best shape of my life. Not just looking my best, but FEELING my best.

3) actually following through with my new years resolutions: this year I won’t just talk about them, I will act on them.  Come January 14th (or somewhere around there) these resolutions will not be a distant and forgotten memory, they will still be the words that are taped to my wall that get me through the day.

If the rumors are true and the world is really going to end in 2012, I only have a little bit more time to make all my dreams come true.  guess I better start working on it…

happy new year, may all your new years resolutions become realities this year.

JKB.

I’m Lovin it. 12.20.10 – Monday – Carlos

Merry Christmas!!

Hope everyone get’s to have a fantastic time with their loved ones. family, blood or not.

I am excited at the prospect of waking up christmas day with 3 very awesome individuals with which i will spend the day with.

Not much to report here…

Just kidding!

When it rains it pours.

I spent last friday on the set of my first nation commercial, and had an absolute blast! I was so nervous that i didn’t really sleep the night before, but i think with experience that will fix itself. When I have details on it, i will send out links ect.

The Town is now available on DVD, and your truly is in the special features. Nothing special, but i am very noticable in a few shots!

I got cast in yet another national spot, for TNT, more info on that.

I’ve been auditioning like a mad man, thanks to my agent and his belief in me. It’s so cool to have a team of people working with you to help you achieve your goals.

Walker got me part 1-15 of 30 for 30 (the espn sports movies) and it’s AWESOME. can’t wait to tear through them.

Almost at 40 lbs, gonna make a mad dash for 50 by the end of the year, but no sweat if i don’t, there’s always 2011.

2010…where did you go. It seems like only yesterday I was a bearded fat man in Boston, with no future.

At least now I’m a beardless less fat man with some promise.

Saw TRON, and it ws stunning. Do yourself a favor and go see it. but don’t bother seeing the original, people have forgotten how incredibly bad it is.

Saw The Kings Speech. Incredible. No doubt Oscar laden picture.

On the list:

Black Swan /HP7/True Grit

I am incredibly lucky and so excited for  a calm, relaxing week of work interrupted by the wonder of christmas morning. In La, for the first time.

Merry Christmas Everyone.

Of to a DELL audition (they still make those?) in a few hours!

Los

Monday 11.29.10 – Carlos

I’m angry.
I’m pissed.
I’m flying through the air, full speed, with a vengance.

This is for the people who make excuses, the people I don’t know, who are comfortable with mediocrity. The people who talk about change but can’t make it happen.

There is a mean streak inside me that is slowly taking over. Like Kanye West says in his INCREDIBLE new album, “gossip gossip, all you niggas stop this, Everybody knows I’m a motherfucking monster” That’s how I feel right now.

I am slowly learning to channel it, but for know its a rage that is being brought out at the smallest thing. The other day I almost pounded someone’s face in because the honked at me for 4 seconds, because I was waiting for an old lady to pull out of her parking space.

I’ve taken to wearing celtics gear 24/7 almost subconsciously in hopes someone says something mean enough, so I can let loose the green monster.

Don’t get me wrong, I am angry, full of rage, but I’m also tha happiest I’ve been in months. I’m nearing 40 lbs of weight loss. Doing it the only way that works…for someone like me…hard hard work at the gym, and 6 meals a day.

I punish myself at the gym with a tenacity I didn’t know I possess. Usually I’ll play 3-4 full cour basketball games, take 200 shots, run a mile, bike 4, and do 3 sets of 5 different weight lifiting. Then its off to the sauna for 10 minutes. Everyday. And if possible, 2 times a day.

It consumes me. It makes me a better person.

Its paying dividends. Shane who I hadn’t seen in 3 weeks flipped out when I saw him today.

Women.
How quickly the tables turn. I’ve been played more than the macarena circa 1996. And it’s all the more fuel for my drive to become who I’m supposed to be.

I made a promise here, that I would weigh 230 lbs, as of right now I’m at 233. And I got 2 days, so I’m confident it’ll happen. Next goal? 217 by Jan 1st.
That’ll make 50 pounds in 4 months. Go Get it. Hope you’re well, and if you don’t like the celtics, stay the fuck out of my way.

On a side note, going to see Roger Waters at the Staples Center, courtesy of a new friend. Thank you.

On a side note, biggest audition of my life tomorrow, I’ll prepare as best as I can, and if it’s meant to be, it’ll happen.

Carlos.

Wednesday 11.24.10 – Steve

Sent Last Week. Apologies from the editorial staff, busy doing absolutely nothing.

So it’s been almost a month a think since I last posted.

 

The reason’s vary, forgetfulness, work schedule, birthday celebrations.

 

But for those of you wondering if I’m still alive (mom), here is the highlight reel. When Friday rolls around I’ll post something a bit more thorough and thought out. But here is something for the peeps.

 

Work. The London Hotel is a very sweet place to vacation.  In face it was just voted #1 Hotel in all of California by some travel magazine.  There is no denying it’s luxury, it’s brilliant location, and it’s customer service.  However, the money it’s providing me is slowly diminishing, as the weather here in LA turns “cold”.  Even the slightest bit of wind or degree drop below 75f and the pool deck is a ghost town.  I may be searching for a new job soon, because an 8-hour shift that yields 46 dollars in my pocket is not going to pay my bills.

 

Blue Man Group. I’m being flown to NYC on December 15 for final callbacks.  It’s a two-day callback (16-17) that will then turn into Blue Man Group training if all goes well.  Obviously, this is the biggest thing I’ve ever gone out for, and I want it, bad.

 

Friends. On my birthday, I was surprised with a camping trip in the northern part of Angeles National Park.  It was relaxing, entertaining, and exactly what I hoped for.  And more than anything, it warmed my heart to have people in my life that would put something like that together for me. To everyone that was involved in planning and visiting me in the woods, thank you, a thousand times over. 

 

Love. Jordan is a certified life rock star and I love her.

 

Life. Overall I’m feeling pretty okay.  Been a bit down lately, feeling as thought I’m going to sleep each night thinking, “man, glad I made it through that day”.  And I know there was a time when I was enjoying the little things in life a bit more, which I think I’ve lost sight of.  So I’m going to try to get back to that.  I know I need to not but all my eggs in the Blue Man basket and continue working on finding work as an actor doing commercials, TV, film, what-have-you. 

 

So now at 24 years old, it’s time to face another year in my life.  I’m 4 days in and still alive, so I got that going for me.  The rest will come with positive thinking and a drive to weather any storm.

 

Be easy

 

steve o

Thursday 11.18.10 – Jordan Kai

Joy.

 

 

What brings you joy?

 

That was rhetorical…. Mostly because you aren’t a specific person… nonetheless, what brings you joy?

 

I can tell you what brings me joy: performing, pizza, baking, and my puppy to name a few.  I ask this because, what happens when the things that bring you joy suddenly stop? If not forever, but for a moment even… a few days, weeks… whatever it is.  What do you do?

 

I have been performing in shows (musicals, plays, dance recitals, singing classes, etc.) since I can remember.  Even when I was in the worst costumes or had the least amount of solos, it still brought me joy.  No matter what, I could count on that feeling.  Getting up on stage or what have you and just feeling joy – bliss even.

 

Recently, I had my first experience where the thing I loved stopped bringing me joy. For the first time in my life, going to the theater, getting in makeup, getting on stage, being with “show people,” felt like a chore, more than that, a burden.  It broke my heart.  I was crying every night thinking about how embarrassed I was of the production, the team, the cast, and the rehearsal process. It seemed to be the only thing on my brain. How was I ever going to get through this awful experience?

 

I talked about never wanting to perform again because what if THIS show was the maximum caliber of professionalism I could achieve? And, if this is it, I don’t want to do it again.

 

That is what happens when you’re purest joy disappoints you.

 

What do you do after that?

 

You get the fuck over it.

 

After weeks of crying and bitching and moaning I realized something: this show was my only outlet for creativity. No WONDER I was beside myself. THIS is not my joy.   My joy comes from people who LOVE and LIVE and BREATHE this stuff.  This thing that I was involved in was just a passing experience, something I will look back on and LAUGH at… not something I will ever cherish or appreciate for anything but “well, I’m glad that’s over, I hope I learned SOMETHING.”

 

That said, I think that when you’re joy disappoints… it is because it isn’t your joy.  Just because I’m on stage, or eating pizza doesn’t mean it is always gonna be perfect.  My joy is my passion, my drive, and this is merely a bump in the road….. So, no, my joy didn’t’ disappoint me … it merely took a vacation.

So, tonight I ask you, what brings you joy? consider it and appreciate it. and remember…. if it isn’t making you happy, look a little deeper, because maybe you’re just not realizing what it is that TRULY brings you joy.

 

 

goodnight sweet friends. thank you for reading.

 

 

Tuesday 11.16.10 – Walker

This week’s big news is that I took an internship!

I’m putting an exclamation point on it even though it’s an internship. I thought I was done with those when I was 19. My feeling on the matter, to date, has been that I am too old, too smart, too qualified, and spent too much on the lovely parchment that graces a shelf in my bedroom to take another internship.

In the last year+ I have come to understand that in fact I am too young, not qualified enough, and fuck your degree, to land the job I want just yet. So I’m going to take that little step backwards, swallow my pride, and do some work for free.

Nonetheless, I am excited! My logic in looking for internships was simply that my days will be better spent doing something in the professional world than ballyhooing about in the valley. So at very worst I will have been kept occupied, and at very best it will magically morph into a brilliant high paying job. And I’ll probably learn something, which to me is almost – almost – as good as a paycheck.

The company is a music and entertainment start up that does two things that are completely unrelated to each other. First, they created an HD video recording booth – it’s kind of like a photo booth, but with HD video, green screen background, adjustable lighting, high quality audio, etc. They even have direct inputs for up to 4 instruments. It’s kind of cool… The other piece is a new audio mastering and remastering technology that allows us to exceed digital zero and create even warmer, fuller sounds. This is expected to blow up. And there are a lot of relatively influential people from all over the entertainment world involved in the venture. My new boss is very laid back and seems like he’ll be great to work with. There’s a chihuahua in the office… I hate chihuahuas, but I like the principle of having a dog in the office.

Now to teach myself to get up at 8am again. I’m pretty sure some of the vintage Walker three-jobs 16-hours non-stop tirelessness has gone dormant in the last 18 months of fluctuating schedules and working nights. We’ll get it back though. I imagine I’ll be good and wiped on days where I start in West Hollywood and wind up in Woodland Hills, but it will all be worth it.

Off for Korean BBQ with Jordan and Abraham (that’s Steve). yummmmmmm

Monday 11.15.10 – Carlos

Talk is oh so very cheap.

We live on results. and here they are. in progression. As mentioned before, I am only responsible for my actions and for keeping my word. Part 1. of Fat 1.

 

thursday 11.11.10 – Jordan Kai

1) Happy Birthday Steve. I love you.

 

 

2) http://www.dapperdanmichael.com

 

 

 

3) enjoy your weekend.

 

 

4) again, happy birthday steveo.