When I was growing up I always felt a little out of place – cue laugh track. I don’t mean because I was weird or different, although that was part of it, but growing up I always felt like an anachronism (–noun 1. something or someone that is not in its correct historical or chronological time, esp. a thing or person that belongs to an earlier time). I write the definition because it was a vocabulary word in 6th grade that, once defined, was never forgotten. Plus, its not used often enough for me to judge you if you don’t know what it means. Rather, I support your learning it. Anyway, I call myself an anachronism because I always felt that I was born in the wrong era. This is a problem that I think a lot of “theater kids,” feel. Wishing they had been born in the golden era of theater and film, when musical performers were respected, celebrated, and famed as much if not more than those who only performed on the screen. But, even at a young age I always had a soft-spot for something that was a little less cool. Instead of Britney Spears, I was listening to Benny Goodman and Jo Stafford. I’d skip Josie and the Pussycats to watch Swing Kids at my house for the millionth time. Even at 13, the late 90’s fashions just didn’t do it for me, so I dawned a ¾ sleeve suit and skirt, seemed stockings, and a dogwood flower with hairnet to my bat mitzvah. That desire to be a part of a different time never died. I wished, when looking back at photos of my nana, that’d I’d been one of her 7 sisters instead of her grandchild so I could wear all of her beautiful outfits, date a man who always wore a suit, and go dancing 5 out of 7 nights… because its just what you did.
As I’ve grown older, most of this hasn’t changed. As far as clothes go – I still look for clothes that would flatter Sophia Loren rather than Kate Moss. I found a great store today called Audrey K in Burbank. All of her clothes are either vintage or inspired-vintage. “The more voluptuous the woman, the better my clothes look on them,” owner Audrey said. Needless to say, I didn’t want to leave.
In a similar but different situation, I’ve always longed to live in the golden age of female comedy. Don’t get me wrong, I love Tina Fey etc… but this was different. When Gilda Radner, Carol Burnett, , and Madeline Kahn were the top. Some how, I feel like I missed the boat. As if the goals I’ve set for myself were already somehow achieved by super fierce bitches 30-40 years before me. But, c’est la vie… if you can join ‘em…. beat ‘em…right? Haha. Guess I’ll try.
I’m sure by now you’re wondering where the heck is this coming from? I started thinking about this because, in addition to all the things I’ve said, I’ve also had an affinity for other artists who feel the same way, like they aren’t in the right time, but rather trying to conform to what everyone else is doing, they find away to bring back the old into the new. Most recently, have to give serious props to Cee-lo with his new tune “F*** You.” Yes, it sounds profain but it is just perfect. He is a hip-hop artist who had a song to share… and ohhhh mama did he. This sounds like it is STRAIGHT out of Motown and I LOVE it. If you haven’t heard it yet, that means you live under a rock, in which case I wonder how you have a computer but nonetheless, no one should suffer another minute without it…
Nevertheless, I can’t sit here, on my bed typing to you and fake like I’m gonna give up just cause I feel out of place. Duh, I still feel out of place, I think that is a lot of who I am. But, whether it be setting my comedy goals high, listening to sweet tunes, or always looking like I’m getting ready to go on set for The Maltese Falcon, I’m gonna be like Cee-lo and tell the universe that I am COOLER than 2010 and I will show you that by working it circa 1949.
Now that I’m done, I’m gonna go listen to the radio. I hear little orphan Annie has a message for me that I can figure out with my decoder. Plus, there is a sale at the Bettie Page store….. psych…I wish there was a sale….
Oh, by the way, did I mention I have a yard? More on that next week.
East to West: A Chronicle 